Slammin' Sammy

I'm not averse to criticising The Artist Formerly Known As Sammy Sosa, but even I couldn't help thinking "Ouch!" when I read this. If the deal goes through, it promises to be an interesting season in Baltimore.

What ails us all

The Futility Infielder's Jay Jaffe is not well. But fear not - he's not been struck down by some horrible virus: what is ailing him, in fact, are the New York Yankees.

Now all baseball fans rant at some time or another about the Yankees (too wealthy, too smug, too successful), but Jay's piece - "I'll Tell You About the Damn Yankees" - is a rarer species, since it's a rant about the Yankees by a Yankee fan. You may or may not agree with what he says, but you have to like that he rants not only with style, but also with stats.

There's a long list of things that Jay is not happy with as regards the Yankee team and organisation, but it isn't until the final paragraph that we learn what the real root cause is:

And finally, I'm sick of temperatures in the single digits and low teens, and the increasingly graying snow still piled on New York City's curbs. I want to see players bathed in sunlight as they run around on green grass wearing their batting-practice jerseys and tossing the ball lackadaisically. I want the next three weeks before Pitchers and Catchers to pass overnight so we can get on with a baseball season that will inevitably take more twists and turns than we can possibly predict. Bring it on.

Regardless of where your allegiances lie, you'd be hard-pressed to find fault with that.

Rainy days and Fridays

There's no sunshine for miles around and no baseball in store for weeks, but thanks to the magic of MLB.com I was able to conjure up both at lunchtime with a click of my mouse.

I could have gone for one of the season's big games, but having watched the ALCS and World Series games several times during the offseason, I think I'm just about big-game'd-out for the moment. That made the selection process very easy: pick a random date (July 25), then a random game (Cincinnati @ Pittsburgh) and just sit down and let the innings unfold.

I didn't get to the end of the game, and I wasn't even following the score that closely, but, to be honest, I didn't really care. For me, right now, it was somewhat akin to Spring Training baseball, where the content matters far less than the form. It was a pressure-free ballgame in a great ballpark and I got what I came for - a connection with the summer game.

There was, however, just one little cloud to my silver lining, and that was the throwback uniforms. I like the idea of baseball connecting with its heritage, but when that means players wearing these, I'm suddenly not so sure. My only consolation is that it could have been a lot, lot worse...

Winter in the city

This evening, on the train home from work, I was subjected to some of the most tuneless accordion-playing that it's ever been my misfortune to hear. I'm not always in the most receptive of moods for music imposed on me on public transport, as I'm usually listening to some myself, and the fact that it was accordion music just made it worse. I really dislike the accordion, and although on occasion it might sound vaguely charming in a touristy Parisian setting, this was definitely not one of those occasions. It sounded awful, and I sat there hoping and praying that the train wasn't going to make any unscheduled stops in the middle of nowhere, thus forcing me to listen to yet more Viennese waltzes and cheesy covers of Edith Piaf songs. Thankfully it didn't, and I finally managed to make it to journey's end without sticking any sharp objects in my eye.

You're thinking: "And the point of the story is...?" Well, none, really, except that Alex Belth had almost the polar opposite of my experience on the New York subway. Check out his fine post over at Bronx Banter.

Now, Alex's writing is great, but it unfortunately couldn't help make today's accordion-playing any more tuneful. However, it did help put the whole thing in a little perspective, and that is never a bad thing.

Here endeth today's lesson.

Free a week on Sunday?

It would appear that football is the subject du jour on many of the blogs I read on a regular basis, so I thought I would chip in with my two penn'th. Now I know nothing about football (except maybe when it's football, and even then, I know less than certain inhabitants of the Pacific Northwest), but as I scanned the Internet for reactions to Carlos Delgado finally deciding that Florida is where he wants to play, this New York Times story caught my eye.

It's not quite "The Rookie", and it's not as if Thomason got picked out of nowhere to suit up in the Superbowl, but it's a nice variation on the "I thought I'd be watching the game at home" story.

Je vis pour ça...

...or, as they say elsewhere: "I Live for This!"

I was thrilled when I read the headline on MLB.com. I thought that this could be my big chance. I could see the ad in my mind's eye: a baseball diamond set up at the foot of the Eiffel Tower (here in all its Saturday Night Fever splendour), me decked out in a major league coach's uniform trying desperately to teach the Washington Nationals the English for such well-known baseball terms as "le carrousel".

Alas, it seems that only those who live in the United States (or at least those who can get to one of the 6 US ballparks being used for the casting calls) will be able to take part in the auditions. Oh well, never mind - back to looking forward to Spring Training. Which begins in 27 days, 1 hour and 52 minutes. Not that I'm counting. Obviously.

Research assistant needed

I'm no expert, but if previous form is anything to go by, this is not necessarily the smartest move the Braves could make. Maybe Mondesi has undergone a total personality change in the offseason. And maybe I'll be the Red Sox 5th starter in 2005.

Actually, looking at what the Braves are reported to be offering Mondesi, I'm not going to call them and offer to be their new research assistant - I'm going to call them and offer to be their starting right fielder. I'll tell them that I'll play for 20% of what Mondesi will be getting, with the added bonus that I'll actually turn up to play every day.

I wish no ill on the Braves, but if this deal goes through, it's an accident waiting to happen. Watch this space for more news...

Update: The Braves have issued an official "Whoa - hold your horses!" press release. My situation remains unchanged, though - I'm still available to play ;-)

Dedicated follower of fashion (repeat and fade)

I promise that this will be the last mention of #31 for a while, but I know that there are legions of Red Sox fans out there (well, 2 or 3, anyway) who are worried about the status of my Dave Roberts replica jersey. Well, worry no more - it arrived today safe and sound all the way from from Bangor, PA (complete with more customs documents than you'd see on a shipment of arms). Here it is, hanging in my living-room, along with my brand-new Red Sox cap:

Before you start writing smart remarks in the comments, I know that you're supposed to wear it, not hang it on your bookshelf, but I wanted to leave it there this evening so that I could admire it for a while. Tomorrow I'll be wearing it to work. No-one will have the slightest idea who the Red Sox are, let alone Dave Roberts, but I don't care - it will be worn with pride, and from now on there will always be a little part of the Paris suburbs that will be a reminder of The Most Important Stolen Base In Red Sox History™ (thanks to Joy of Sox for the link).

A team to watch

SI's Tom Verducci argues that although the Mets may not contend - even with their superstar signings - they will at least be relevant, and that means everything to a team about to launch a TV network which it hopes will compete with that of its crosstown rivals.

Soul-food

A little bit of nostalgia - particularly in the middle of winter - is always good for the soul. Beyond Boxscores ("Uninformed opinions, mindless comments, ridiculous assertions. Yes, it's another sports blog.") has a good post on the memories evoked by catching an old edition of This Week in Baseball.

The show brought back to me the sights, sounds, emotions and, yes, even the smells of an era long gone. I had thoughts of our games in a school yard. Clear summer days, diving catches and no one allowed to hit to rightfield.

I didn't have that growing up - it was more like endless games of one of baseball's venerable ancestors - but Brian's thoughts did get me longing for the advent of spring. Only 35 days to "pitchers & catchers"...

Dedicated follower of fashion

For the first time that I can remember I experienced a rare sighting this morning - as I was changing trains just outside of Paris, I saw someone wearing a replica baseball jersey. This may not sound like a big deal to those of you on the other side of the Atlantic, but believe me, it is. It was even more surprising because the jersey in question wasn't a 'high-profile' Yankees or Mets jersey - it was a Cincinnati Reds jersey, complete with Junior's name and number on the back. Coming across something like that in the suburbs of Paris is somewhat akin to coming across someone in Ohio wearing a Racing Club de Lens shirt.

I was very curious, and I wanted to stop the guy in question and ask how he came to be wearing the jersey, but there were hundreds of people around rushing to catch their trains, so it wouldn't have been easy. Plus, he was a biiiig guy, and you never know how someone might react when you stop them in a public place to talk a little baseball.

Hopefully next week - if the MLB.com shop gets its act together - I'll be the guy wearing the shirt. So if you see someone on the train outside Paris wearing this particular jersey:

it'll probably be me, so stop and say hi...

Done deal

As I said yesterday, I wasn't really all that worried where Carlos Beltran ended up, and I'm certainly not a big fan of Scott Boras playing one club off against the other, but it is good to see that the apparent resolution of the Beltran saga has Mets fans feeling good about their team, which is not something we've seen a lot of over the past couple of seasons. It looks like New York has two major league teams once again.

Wanted: Baseball

We're currently at that horrible mid-point of the offseason where we're more or less as far away from last season as we are from next season, and the withdrawal symptoms are starting to be felt from Paris to Pawtucket.

In Paris, I'm starting to long for early-morning box scores and late-night games on MLB.TV. This is traditionally a time for reflection, speculation and hope, and I have to say that I've done my bit - I've watched the games I downloaded from MLB.com, I've read the books Santa Claus was kind enough to drop in my stocking (size 12, just to be on the safe side), I've even ordered my Dave Roberts replica jersey, but to be honest, I just want to watch some baseball. I know that this is a time for re-tooling and rebuilding, but the trade talk / rumours / deadlines are starting to wear me out - I really don't care whether Carlos Beltran ends up with the Astros or the Mets, and the news that the Randy Johnson deal is all but signed, sealed and delivered leaves me totally underwhelmed. Seriously, outside of the money aspect - which I can think about and deal with in an abstract, Monopoly-money kind of way - am I supposed to be interested in the fact that

"Johnson's current deal also calls for him to receive two courtside tickets for Phoenix Suns games through the 2010-11 season and six premium tickets for all Diamondbacks games starting with the first season of his retirement through 2010. Arizona will retain responsibility for that part of the contract." ?

I'm bored, but I'm not that bored...

One other sure sign that baseball is still too far away is that I had another of my sporadic and weird "meet a baseball player" dreams. The last time I had one of these was back in August, when I was clearly being overexposed to the game. Now that I'm not being exposed to the game at all, my subconscious decided that it would take over and put me back in the thick of the action. Once again, I was at my folks' place and who should turn up but Pedro Martinez? Naturellement... Of course, the sometimes twisted logic of dreams means that, instead of hanging out with Pedro and quizzing him on how it felt to win the World Series or the whys and wherefores of his move to the Mets, I went into a blind panic because I couldn't find a baseball for him to sign. Next time I go back to England, I must remember to take a baseball with me so that I'll be prepared - virtually, at least - the next time a Hall of Fame pitcher turns up on the doorstep.

The one thing I found reassuring in all of this was that I'm apparently not the only blogger having dreams of Pedro - Jay Jaffe has been having them as well, although he admittedly does have the excuse of a little too much Cabernet.

Meanwhile, in Pawtucket (and other corners of Red Sox Nation) the lack of real, live baseball has journalists doing strange things too, namely looking for stories where there aren't any. Surviving Grady has a good take on the whole ridiculous saga of "The Ball". From what I've read, it would seem that "sense of irony" was not on Dan Shaugnessy's Christmas list, but I suppose that now he no longer has the Curse of the Bambino to sell, he has to come up with something to write about.

All things considered, it's high time the silly season came to an end and the real season began...